In my role as chair of the Cosmopolitan magazine advisory board, I have the opportunity to speak to many Cosmo advertisers and supporters about Millennials’ interests, goals and preferences. Last month, Cosmopolitan.com gave me a chance to speak to the magazine’s young-professional readers directly in an advice column answering a few of their questions about how to navigate the world of work and their evolving careers.
Here’s one of them.
How Should You Handle an Older Co-Worker’s Age Bias?
I currently work in the health care industry in finance. All of my coworkers are 20-plus years older than me. From my first day, I felt undeniable judgment based off my age. How can I overcome this and show that I deserve to be where I am?
The way I see it, you have a few options:
- Ignore the judgment. If you know you’re doing a good job and no one is outwardly criticizing you, then who cares what your coworkers think of your age? Once they see that you’re working hard and making a contribution like everyone else, they’ll eventually get over it. Manage the potential discomfort by finding a mentor or confidante who can help keep your confidence up. If you’re still struggling or concerned this judgment will affect your ability to be promoted or to be given more responsibilities, consider the next two tips…
- Empathize. My hunch is that the judgment you feel is more likely fear — fear among the older folks that you’re the “new guard” that’s arrived to change everything. To quash that fear, do your best to be totally gracious and humble. That doesn’t mean you can’t do a kickass job, but you can do it while showing respect for the longer tenure and experience of your older colleagues. This might include asking for their opinions on a regular basis, seeking their input when reaching out to a longtime client or vendor, and generally being as polite and gracious as possible. (And, you know, not laughing when they ask you how to use “the Twitter”).
- Confront the issue. If the judgment gets really bad, you might need to call out your colleagues’ unfair treatment of you. Pick a quiet moment and ideally have a conversation with each person one-on-one, saying something like this: “I can’t help but notice that my age seems to be getting in the way of our working together — for instance, the other day when you said in front of our client that I’m younger than your kids. Am I doing something to act young or immature? Let me know because I love working on this team and want us to be as successful as possible.” Chances are by calling out the behavior, you’ll earn some serious respect and maybe even an apology.
To read the other questions and find out how I responded, check out the full column at Cosmopolitan.com.
And if you want to learn even more about navigating your career, my new book Becoming the Boss: New Rules for the Next Generation of Leaders is full of additional career and leadership advice!
